i get into relationships so i can relate to sad music (freeverse)

music to make me feel 
colours to give life 
words to make it real 
pictures capturing an ecstasy 
surreal and abstract 
without this for you, there is no me


i don't seek you
i don't feel you,
without these meanings

no joy to realize
we have nothing,
if we don't idealize

through art 
we've created our love

Ego is everything

I know of a person who has tyrannized the ego, abolishing it from his very existence. Turning it into a symptom of all human evil and labeling it as an enemy to mankind. He proposes we need to rid ourselves of the ego to achieve a higher state of being human but it is the ego itself that gives us our humanity. He has set himself on a path of struggle to attain a greater goal for himself and others that he believes will usher in a divine human purpose. Without knowing it, he is acting directly on his ego. The ego wants to live for something greater than itself, it wants a higher purpose and a higher meaning so it can elevate itself to this greatness and it wants to suffer and to struggle for this greatness because in suffering is how we achieve greatness. Human beings who express the highest form of ego are willing to die just for an idea or cause, just for something outside of the self that is greater than the self; these are the people who sacrifice themselves for the greater good and suffer for what they believe is right. This is how the world is formed. The world is inherently meaningless, mankind cannot come to grips with the nothingness so we extend our power over it and shape it like it is clay and we mold this world to our desires. This is how religion has started. Man through living in a world with no purpose and no meaning wants to elevate himself to something greater so they create a God to create a world of meaning and divine purpose that can satiate the desires of the ego and make their existence important. The abstractions man creates from the ego are formulated because the ego desires suffering, it wants to struggle and it craves action to spark its progress.  The desire to help others is also part of the ego. Through helping others we extend our power onto them, the power of our ego, and from this we gain recognition and feel like we matter in a world where we are looked at as human beings deserving of respect and dignity and our existence is meant to be appreciated. Helping others is the highest purpose of the ego because it increases its power and extends itself among others which sublates its desires into a greater whole. This is our humanity, this is what separates us from animals. This is where our spirit comes from. Without this, there is no passion, there is no reverence for life, there is no creation. Growth and progress of self and others is only possible through an ego that views such things as important and necessary, without this ego there would be full nihilism where the desire for growth and the struggles that it brings would seem utterly pointless because it serves no end, it has no meaning. Animals live with no meaning, they live for nothing higher than themselves and negating the ego is a progression into animal life. As the individual gathers experience and builds their identity, they project onto the world their values and morphs the world to suit those values. The greatest works of art and music is built on the egos of the artist. The ego creates kingdom and empires, it instills on the world its truth and it spreads affecting other egos through its power.

Ego has laid the foundation for every meaning in this world. 

The ego is what makes us who we are. Without ego, the self disintegrates, without the self, there is a hinderance in consciousness and a hinderance in human desire. One desires to fulfill the self. Desiring brings something to the self, where it can fulfil and nullify the longing for it. Without ego, there is no desire. There is no creation, everything is meaningless, mankind does not possess any power, they have no respect for self and others and are alienated in the world and deprived of their very humanity. Through ego, all creation is formed, all the good and the bad, it is part of the whole, the whole of what makes us human and what creates meaning in the meaningless.

The shock of losing the meaning (on Baudrillard)

We live in a world that has become more real than ever before. A world filled with meaning, meaning that has been given to it by technological progress. We are enthralled in a world of media and a virtual reality that preludes it. Baudrillard sees reality as a simulation, a doubling that has nothing behind it. There is nothing that exists behind the meanings and the symbolism that we attribute it too. Language gives meaning to the world, it constructs our very reality. The symbolisms and the appearance that we give unto events or things is what constitutes their essence. Looking at events through an inhuman perspective, there exists nothing but action, there is no meaning, no symbolic order that can assign it a meaning, it does not exist in idea. Through a human lens an event starts to take on many attributes, through language it becomes a simulation of itself, covering the nothing that it is, instilling in it a meaning that is relative. This meaning does not exist, it is simulated by outside sources which are mediums of information.

The reality that exists has become so hyper-realized that events in real-time do not hold the same values as a past or future event. An eruption or outbreak penetrates through the veil of reality producing a shock.  How could this happen? why did this happen? this sudden lapse of meaning is what gives it the shock. The event happening in real time becomes too real than real (hyperreal), having no symbolic value it takes us right out of the reality that we are living in and places us right in the thick of a true reality with no meaning. This reality is very inhumane and it destroys the simulation of reality. It is only after the event, that it becomes simulated and is given meaning.

I would like to use pornography as an example for what Baudrillard means by the “hyperreal”. In pornography the scenes enacted are more real than “real”. They are pure fantasy, they give the acts symbolic value through a medium of information (video), this gives the acts more reality, there is meaning here. Sex in real life, the sensuous activity experienced  loses the meaning it had through hyperreality. It is very different because it is now more real than real, it has lost a meaning and it becomes shocking. The act is not what is expected, it takes you out of the semblances of reality and places you into a  “hard” reality. This is the same thing that happens when events that have been simulated through their appearances and imagery actually transpire in real-time. The meaning is gone, it’s lost. The very fact that the meaning is (for a short period) nonexistent signifies that the very meanings the events have are simulated by a power outside of itself, that brings it into our reality, that covers the nothingness inherent in our true reality, in the apathy of the world.

When Baudrillard says certain events have not actually happend what he means is that, the imagery and the ideological values that we assign to these events are not part of reality, they are part of a hypperreality that assigns it meaning. This is the simulation. We simulate the event through the symbolic order of language and affixing it the appearance of what it represents.

We are very stuck in this hyperreality (where things take on more reality), that actual events seem almost unreal compared to it. There is a dissonance here where one world permeates itself throughout all of life and another world at sudden times takes over through a “violent” act and changes the very fabric of what we know to be “reality”. This reality, this new reality, that is very different from any other historical period has fetishized life to the point it has disillusioned itself.